Not sure if its a bad habit to have..but since young whenever I enter the self-reflection mode, I just can’t stop. Last night, I had the longest episode of it.
It started after a friend commented (with all good intentions),
“for a sagi, you are not very frank”.
There and then, it struck a chord in me. Together with looking at the copywriting on my namecard, I realized I’m just tired. Not exhaustion, but the feeling of being sick and tired.
To be comfortable in my own skin
Since young I’ve admired those who can write well. To using metaphors to enhance the depth of their writing, to have a variety of sentence structures stringing their thoughts together. Afterall, even Paul Graham once wrote an essay on how “Writing doesn’t just communicate ideas; it generates them.” (it’s a great read by the way)
Trying to squeeze out a beautiful one-liner on my namecard felt unnatural. It felt forced. After re-looking at it several times, I felt almost a sense of disgust to realize that I’m trying to become a person I am not.
In the recent months, I’ve been clearer of the path I want to lead, but at the same time, have gone further away from how I would normally express myself.
There’s nothing wrong to strive to become a better writer, a more extroverted explorer or a more skilled “designer” (adding the ” ” to not insult the expertise). What’s wrong was my attempt to be like others whom I admire. Sure, this sounds cliche..the whole quote of not living under someone else’s dogma.
To be straightforward
When I rewrote the copy to be straightforward, I felt a sense of relief and comfort. The droning weight on my head was lifted off, and I was suddenly a happier person. Isn’t it funny how a small change can lead to such a dramatic emotion?
Moving forward..I’m gonna return back to living a straightforward life.
This entry is getting long. As such, the next few entries will elaborate on this theme. Specifically…on what it really means and not to be just direct or simple.